Prayer

If you're following along with me, I want you to be able to see the heart behind my efforts. That's why I created the "Prayers" tab. This is the place where I will get a little vulnerable and share some excerpts from my personal prayer journal. (Not all of them, because I do believe in having "a secret place" with God.) I hope sharing some of my triumphs and struggles helps encourage you in your own journey. It's a little scary, but sharing my spiritual walk with you is the MOST important to me. Of course, if you have prayer requests of your own, send them to me via the "contact" tab!

Why is it - when thinking about surrendering everything to You - it’s so easy to leave the good things at Your feet but it’s SO dang hard to leave the failures, the disappointments, and the burdens?

Maybe because when I’m leaving the good things, it’s like “I made this! For You! I can’t wait to see what You do with it! You can share it, or You can keep it in a secret place. I really don’t care; I just want You to have it.”

But when it’s my failure, sin, shame, or anything I perceive as bad...well, it feels like I’m unloading it on You. And to be honest, it makes me feel like I don’t deserve Your grace, or Your mercy, or any blessings past this point. 

I know that’s a totally screwed up mindset, but sometimes I can’t get past feeling this way. I want to share my victories with You. And I do bring the failures also...but I feel guilty about it. I can’t look You in the eyes, because it hurts too much. 

Anyway. Just a (brooding much?) thought for today. 

I pray that You will help me RECEIVE Your grace and mercy better. And I also pray that I’ll unashamedly lay it all down at Your feet. In the times when there are more successes and failures, but also especially the times when there are more failures than there is success. Because those are the times I need to lean on You and Your mercy the most. And those will be the times I have a spiritual breakthrough - the kind that draws me even closer to You.